Conchita is the new Queen of Eurovision!

Well anyone reading this certainly watched it all unravel last night, so why bother mentioning individual scores? All we need to care about is CONCHITA WURST - THE NEW QUEEN OF EUROVISION! Huge Congratulations to Conchita and to Austria, and a big fuck you to the haters. Nuff said...

Conchita Wurst celebrating after winning the 59th edition of the Eurovision Song Contest. She managed a grand total 290 points and stole the show with her image, her song and her message. The juries and televoters have fallen in love with a new star. Roll on Vienna 2015!

But I'm sure you're sick of reading about Conchita already? I'm not, but there are some other items on this agenda. We'll get the big one out the way first... WHY DID YOU NOT ALL VOTE FOR MOLLY? Ha ha ha ha ha, I'm gutted the UK didn't do better! But I said it before the contest and I'll say it again now, first or last, Molly has done an incredible job for her country and should hold her head high. So what if they didn't all fall in love with it? The mass Eurovision fan community did, and you cannot deny that Children of the Universe is a stunning song. She should have done better, but then, in my opinion, Greece and Malta should have done much better too. And that's all it is at the end of the day - opinions. The BBC need to keep doing this: give unsigned acts a chance, use the wide spread talent we have! You also have to feel for Italy, who just had their worst ever showing at a Eurovision, as well as Azerbaijan flopping BIG time. Any UK fans need to remember that Austria have just waited 48 years for victory. Spain haven't won since '69, Netherlands '75 (oh big Congrats to the Dutch! Cracking show, best result in years and thoroughly deserved. First Anouk and now the Common Linnets, keep 'em coming!), and although the list could go on, Portugal keep trying and have never finished higher than 6th. "Everybody hates us" - oh shut up! Nobody hates us. Next!

The next thing we need to all think about is how we want the voting to take place. Yet again, the day after is the day of CONTROVERSY! And what controversy we have this year! First off, the Armenian jury marked Azerbaijan 25th out of 25, and vice versa. It looks like Montenegro have done something shifty as well...especially when looking at Montenegro/Armenia results. Georgia's jury vote wasn't even used because of some sort of breach in jury rules, so just their televote was used. And thank god it did, it gave the UK points! But looking at it seriously, something isn't right and it needs investigating. Oh and you have to feel for Poland (and Switzerland). Poland would have finished 6th if it was 100% televoting with countries like UK and Ireland giving them top points from televoting. However the juries certainly did not love it. Malta had the same thing happen but the other way round - 6th with juries but not the best with televoters. If we're all honest though, a 50/50 split is going to result in one or two countries at least dividing televoters and juries like Marmite. I say investigate the controversy, but ignore the calls for changes. Keep it 50/50 for a few years.

Let's also mention the booing, and the politics. Russia giving Austria 5 points!? Well Done! Obviously Russian people are not happy about the situation in their country, and the LGBT community responded with televotes for Conchita. Say what you think about that, but that to me is a marvellous thing. I was shocked Russia and Ukraine did not exchange 12 points, but it just goes to show that Politics is not as big in Eurovision this year as we all dreaded it might be. It's socio-political to vote for a bearded lady even if she screamed blue murder for 3 minutes, but Conchita had a sensual James Bond ballad and a stunning voice. She won for the song just as much as for the image. 

And how can it be ALL political when Austria, the Netherlands and Sweden finished 1, 2, 3? 3 Western countries completing the top 3 tells me the exact obvious. 

There has to be a big mention to our hosts from last night! Denmark I think put on one of the best Eurovision contests I've ever seen. In my personal opinion, Baku, Moscow and Dusseldorf have all put on spectaculars in the last few years, but Copenhagen really had something special. The staging was aesthetically brilliant, the postcards all required originality and some of them were incredible, the hosts were quick witted and provided some of that great Scandinavian humour, the interval acts were very good, and I just really, really appreciated the whole thing. So much to say that it might be favourite host city so far. Debate ensuing... However, the most magical part of everything which makes me argue it's my favourite is 'Rainmaker'. Emmelie de Forest singing with all the finalists, and by the looks of it, the entire arena as well, was "magic". I can't describe it better than that! That will be one of the performances I'll remember for some time.

And so we move to Vienna 2015. The English are going crazy... the last time Austria won the Eurovision Song Contest was 1966, incidentally the same year that England last won the FIFA World Cup. I won't bore you with the other coincidental football statistics, but as a fan of football too, there is a brightside to only finishing 17th last night! Thankyou to all countries who gave us points, to all readers who voted for the UK, and a huge Good Luck to Austria for hosting the 2015 and 60th edition of the contest. Next year is going to be big everybody! Thankyou for reading my blog and following the posts. I hope they have been interesting and summarative. I throw in my opinions because so many blogs try to stay neutral in my opinion. I'm not. I hope you join me to look forward to no. 60 and are revelling in a victory for freedom today! Well Done Conchita Wurst.

Rise Like a Phoenix - Conchita Wurst - your winner!

Who will use as a toilet break tonight?

In one of my favourite posts of the Eurovision season, I will draw everyone's attention back to the running order - you need to decide your toilet break song!

Okay, so there is a interval or two, and you don't really need to watch all 37 countries release their votes...but after a few too many beers are you really gonna be able to hold it in for more than a couple of songs? And what happens when you need to refresh your drink? Too many possibilities not to plan your evening.

This year the producers have made it extremely hard to select an ideal toilet break/refreshment top up whatever you want to call it. So what you have pause on your tv? That doesn't count.
I was really tempted by breaking during Azerbaijan in 3rd slot...but Azerbaijan are one of my favourite nations in the contest, I'm a big fan of Dilara and 'Start a fire' and plus, they're only 3rd. Therefore I say hold tight till Germany in 12th. Sorry fans of Elaiza, but really, it isn't right! The bland performance from the Germans runs into a commercial break for the rest of Europe so this is a chance for a mega break - go to toilet, grab another 3 cans, refill the peanuts, straighten up your country's flag and get back to your hot seat. A blip in the show will provide lots of space for talking; especially when Russia take to the stage. I will put money on it that my housemates will discuss Russian politics when the twins take stage. After letting them continue through Italy and Slovenia (excellent chances to break if you've forgotten anything), shit will start to get better around Finland in 18 (no pun intended there!). And if you're really desperate, I'm sure many won't mind you skipping Switzerland in 20 or Valentina's final performance for San Marino in slot 25. Then UK fans better be ready for Molly to take the roof off!

The EBU have released the running order for the votes following last night's jury rehearsal...there's whisper on the web that this indicates a western country has won the jury vote...are we heading Austria, Netherlands, UK, Sweden? Even Hungary could have won it to be fair. Let's not speculate about the voting order, because the jury and televoters will not necessarily vote in unison.

5 hours to go now, this shit is getting exciting!

POST SEMI FINAL 2 EXCITEMENT (2014 Edition)

Aaaaaah Eurovision week is going far too quickly! I don't want it to end. But one advantage is that the final is only one sleep away now...

Whose still hungover from the excitement last night? The Friday after the second semi final is always more tiring simply because we all stay up later for the draw. But for now, let's look back at another brilliant night of Eurovision.

The 10 qualifiers from semi final 2 are (if you don't know this by now, where the hell have you been?): Malta, Norway, Poland, Austria, Finland, Belarus, Switzerland, Greece, Slovenia, and Romania.

Let's first discuss the qualifiers...well are any of them a shock to you? With hindsight the qualifiers seem so god damn obvious! Performing near the end of semi final was always going to be more beneficial in such a wide open race to qualification, hence the success of Switzerland and Slovenia... and those early enough in the draw to qualify all had something going for them; Carl Epsen of Norway produced an absolutely stunning vocal guaranteed to get Mums all over Europe falling in love. Additionally, Poland had breasts, Finland had a fangirl rock band, and Austria had a bearded lady. Huge Congratulations has to go to Malta for qualifying right from position 1. Malta seemed to get a little abuse from Eurofans, which seemed absurd to me, but obviously Maltaford and Sons have popularity across the continent. A quick mention to Belarus - the performance was slick and was sure to get all the other Mums in Europe falling in love. Finally there was Greece and Romania: anyone thinking these 2 wouldn't qualify evidently knows nothing about Eurovision.

So let's get to the bit everyone is complaining: the non-qualifiers! 5 participants had to fail to make it and there was always going to be disappointment over who wouldn't make it. Before I begin, fans who complain need to accept it and move on. If you struggle with that, then ask yourself; did you give all 20 of your votes to your favourite who didn't qualify? If you did then stay pissed at the juries till next year, if not, then really just get over it!
The biggest complaint is Israel failing to qualify! Well, Mei Finegold certainly delivered a stunning routine, and although I originally couldn't stand 'Same Heart', it was beginning to grow on me. Nevertheless, it was in my opinion very overrated and to see it not make the final isn't that much of a shock. But I hear your protests already so I'll defend my thinking as to why they didn't qualify: it was too generic! Israel failed to qualify alongside Ireland, FYR Macedonia and Lithuania. On the whole, you could argue all of these are fairly simple. Someone who is going to like Israel will probably have also liked Ireland, FYR Macedonia and Lithuania. Them failing to qualify as well probably meant that their similarities worked against them and divided like-minded voters. That's my explanation of it anyway. Israel probably did the best of the 4, for Ireland gave a horribly lifeless performance, Lithuania's Vilija was rocking a futuristic Celine Dion outfit, and Tijana of FYR Macedonia didn't have the best vocal. But I sit here and criticise them in the smallest ways. In reality, all countries gave it there all last night and should feel very proud!
The only other qualifier I haven't mentioned is Georgia. And I don't feel I need to say any more.

But let's now discuss the draw for the final! Well as a UK citizen, you can predict my fangasm when other contenders like Greece, Romania, Norway and Austria were all allocated in the first half of the final. Its fate surely? We didn't have to wait as long as last year to see the running order, so thank you very much to Sand, EBU and DR for such a speedy release. I first saw the news on Ruth Lorenzo, Spain's entry, twitter, and couldn't fathom as to why noone else had reported on the running order for about 5 minutes...then realised I needed to update my twitter feed. The UK are to perform 26th and last...
My initial thought: well that's any chance of victory gone. My thought now: WE CAN DO THIS!
The best bit about the UK performing last is that 'Children of the Universe' has the potential to bring the house down! In reality, it's a producers dream because it can so easily finish the show. I guarantee that the UK was pencilled in to perform last since Molly grabbed that all important second half allocation. But what about the rest of the draw? Where does everyone stack up now?
Well Ukraine are opening the show. Hmmm... We could spend hours thinking about this, but if we just think about the song then surely we have a brilliant opener too. An attractive young girl with a modern and upbeat pop song, performed with a good looking man running in a hamster wheel. What a better way to open the show to fresh viewers! Looking down the running order and the producers have done a sterling job. Azerbaijan in 3rd...will they finish top 5 again this year? It looks certainly doubtful...early hot favourites Armenia are as early as 7th...not sure if that'll help them at all...Greece in 10th...Conchita will rock everyone for Austria in 11th...Sweden were given 13th, well we all expected that...the hot spots 16-22 give us Spain as potential contenders, but more importantly HUNGARY IN 21ST. Well surely we know we're all headed to Budapest in 2015? After that Denmark look good for at least top 10 in 23rd (but we all knew that anyway)...chart enthusiasts will be delighted with the Netherlands in 24th and so it looks good for them. San  Marino are in 25th, so at least we assured of Valentina Monetta not getting nil points. And then of course, the UK to close. As I just said, it looks very nice for Hungary to win...

The only people who still don't think Hungary could grab it are the bookmakers...oddschecker reports that many favourites are now drifting in the betting. You can get Hungary as high as 16-1 at 'bwin' which looks extremely tasty at the moment. Sweden currently lead, Austria have shortened to second, and the Netherlands look pretty in 3rd. As a Eurovision fan growing up in the 00s, I have to say that seeing those 3 as the top 3 seems absolutely bonkers, and the fact that Conchita Wurst is so hot to win is like winning in itself.

Below is the full draw for the final:

01 Ukraine
02 Belarus
03 Azerbaijan
04 Iceland
05 Norway
06 Romania
07 Armenia
08 Montenegro
09 Poland
10 Greece
11 Austria
12 Germany
13 Sweden
14 France
15 Russia
16 Italy
17 Slovenia
18 Finland
19 Spain
20 Switzerland
21 Hungary
22 Malta
23 Denmark
24 Netherlands
25 San Marino
26 United Kingdom


Good Luck to all performers in the final! A special Good Luck to Molly Smitten-Downes and the United Kingdom!

The final of the 59th Eurovision Song Contest will start in Copenhagen, Denmark at 21:00 CET, 20:00 BST on BBC1 for UK viewers.

POST SEMI FINAL 1 EXCITEMENT (2014 edition)

Good Afternoon readers! Who is still hungover from the excitement of the first semi final last night?

To start with, wasn't last night just spectacular? Its good to have Eurovision back on our TV screens after another year. I personally thought the stage was brilliant; the diamond floor and squared backdrop came across really nicely on TV, and it was used well throughout. The opening sequence was a little cheesy if we're all honest, and I did want it to end much sooner than it did. The hosts looked like they were having fun though. Oh and then there was the interval act. I never find out what the interval acts are and how they're rehearsing as I like to keep some magic for the show. Although forgetful, I thought the interval act was very nice, and the diamonte tracksuit will be remembered for time to come.

But what about the entrants! Well I thought every country gave it their all on the night and should be thoroughly congratulated on an excellent performance. The only exception to that is Andras Kallay-Saunders, who I found personally gave a weak vocal performance. Not too much criticism though, he gave an energetic performance and was rewarded with qualification. I predict that he won last night's semi final.

And that moves me on to the qualifiers!
They were: Armenia, Sweden, Iceland, Russia, Azerbaijan, Ukraine, San Marino, Netherlands, Montenegro, Hungary.

Once again I only got 8/10 correct, with San Marino and Iceland replacing Moldova and Estonia. Were there any shock qualifiers? Well in reality, there weren't. I ate my words as I watched Iceland's "Pollaponk" bring the house down! Well they definitely were one of the favourites in my house anyway. I suppose the biggest shock was San Marino qualifying, but I did have them 11th in my pre-semi final prediction so it wasn't much a shock for me. I am so pleased for Valentina Monetta, it's true what they say about being "third time lucky"!

Eurovision fans have been mourning the loss of Tanja and Estonia from the competition, but it definitely felt very much like Cascada and 'Glorious' from last year, so at the most they would have qualified and finished in the bottom 5/6. Tanja had a great choreography, but I think it was a bit too generic and a bit too early on to qualify. As for Moldova! Well I've always got a soft spot for them, and perhaps prediciting 'Wild Soul' in the final was a bit too optimistic. Still I though diaspora voting would carry them through, but perhaps countries like Ukraine and Portugal were a bit too preoccupied with other entrants to send douze points there way. And that brings me to Ukraine...and Russia....

I've never been a fan of 'Tick Tock' but it's definitely a good song when performed, and we know the Ukrainians would provide some of the best staging yet again. The Giant Hamster Wheel went down like a storm and although in reality rather simple, it visually works perfect for a TV audience. And plus, Mariya is a very pretty girl, always guaranteed votes for being mega hot. Did Ukraine give Russia 12 points is the question? Well, who gave Russia points? Russia would always benefit from a generous diaspora vote, and former Soviets are likely to give them points. Plus, no matter how much Eurovision fans don't like the song/boycott the Russian entry, 'Shine' has all the elements that an Eastern European jury will marvel in, and two attractive blonde twins will go down well with males across Europe. I don't think the Russians squeezed into the final, but I still don't predict they will take the roof off in the final. I could see Russia finishing 14th or something, just missing out on a left-hand side position. The booing that the twins experienced when they were announced as qualifiers was absolutely disgusting. Booing Aram MP3 for 'potentially' homophobic remarks at Eurovision In Concert is one thing, but booing an act for making the final is just awful. There are many ways to express your current discontent with Russia, and Eurovision is not one of them. I say Good Luck to the twins for the final!

On a more positive note, who do you think just missed out on qualification to the final? Jan Ola Sand has since tweeted that there were just 3 points separating 10th, 11th and 12th last night. This means that two countries were agonisingly close to qualifying! My money is on Estonia and Moldova, but I've heard a number of combinations from the 6 countries who were unfortunate not to make it.

Finally we come to the first half, second half draw for the final. I've heard many UK fans say that the draw was fate, and well if we're honest, having quite a few favourites draw to perform in the first half makes it look even more positive for the UK. The draw so far looks like this:

First Half
Armenia
Azerbaijan
Germany
Iceland
Montenegro
Sweden
Ukraine
(6 slots left)

Second Half
France
Hungary
Italy
Netherlands
Russia
San Marino
Spain
United Kingdom
23. Denmark (randomly drawn before the semi finals began)
(4 slots left)


Well as you all know, Armenia, Azerbaijan, Sweden and Ukraine all performing in the first half means that one of them will not make the top 10, if not more. Performing in the second half has always been more beneficial, but it's not the be all and end all. However, the producers do now have a bit of a headache, having to select to choose where each of them performs. But as I said, they wont all do well. Is this the first year Azerbaijan wont make the top 10? Will they even finish on the left-hand side?
The second half of the draw does look very pretty for Molly and the UK at the moment. The only big rival is Hungary, and I have a sneaky feeling they might steal it this year. 'Running' is very well polished, and I think it could chart all over Europe...and that reminds me! Charts! I'm sure you've all heard how the Common Linnets are charting everywhere! This is brilliant news! The odds for the Dutch to win are falling rapidly, and could we be heading to the land of the orange next year? I'll be the first to admit that I never saw this coming. But Congratulations to them! They have a second half performance too, is it all falling into place for the Netherlands at the right time? I gave their staging a maximum 20/20 in my pre-contest scoring prediction, and I can see the juries lapping it up...but it seems televoters are too. All will be revealed Saturday, it's just too exciting!

Well the next semi final kicks off the same time at 20:00 CET and 21:00 BST on Thursday 8th May. We'll be joined by the final 10 qualifiers for the final on Saturday. It's a close one this year, no more close than the second semi final. Here are my predictions again:
Malta, Israel, Norway, Poland, Austria, Lithuania, Finland, Ireland, Greece and Romania. But I think it's impossible to predict. I could get just 5/10 or I could get the max 10/10 right.

And now back to revision I go, procrastination can survive no longer!

Will they finally qualify? Yes, it's the Netherlands!

I never thought I'd say it. Watch out for the Dutch. They could be about to take Eurovision by a storm.

The song? 'Birds'.
The artist? 'Anouk'.

Wow. Just wow. This is simply beautiful.

The Netherlands are one of the most successful acts ever in Eurovision. Ireland have won most times with 7 wins, followed by France, Luxembourg, United Kingdom and Sweden with 5 wins. Then comes the Netherlands. They have 4 wins; 1957, 1959, 1969, and 1975. They haven't even been in the top 3 since then. Following their win in 1975, they had varied success - they never came last, but then as just mentioned, they never challenged the top spots. And then came the 21st century. Like many other western countries, the demise of success came after the 90's with the influx of eastern European countries. However, it has hit hardest in the Netherlands - a proud Eurovision nation with a history of some beautiful songs. Teddy Scholten's 'Eet Beetje' (the winner in 1959) is a classic! Since the introduction of the semi finals in 2004, they have qualified once. Just once - and that was in 2004. That's how long we have been absent of the Dutch representative. They haven't had bad songs and it's an unfair record in my opinion. Nevertheless, that is all about to change. Anouk will fly high with 'Birds' and she will qualify - and contend.

Birds is the type of song which doesn't disappear from your mind. Birds is the type of song which makes you think. And you want to know the lyrics. And you want to know what they mean. Even if it takes you several listens, over and over again, you don't mind - you enjoy it. You have this song on repeat. It's deep and metaphorical. It has been composed beautifully. The lyrics are beautiful. It's simple a beautiful song. Beatifully sad that is. People can connect to this song and it's emotive language - and it's a contender. If it doesn't even qualify then I want to know what the beef is with the Netherlands.

Good Luck to Holland!

Netherlands - 2012

The dutch have gone for Joan Franka with her song "You and Me".

COME ON JOAN FRANKA! I really, really like this song. It's not as great as some other songs, but the whole performance of You and Me makes me truly adore this song. The Netherlands haven't qualified since 2004 (nevermind Portugal doing badly, the Netherlands haven't had any real success since the introduction of semi finals).

Joan Franka has real talent, has co-composed a cracking song, has such strong stage presence, and a Eurovision winning Indian head-dress, which all equals to me success. So why Europe, are we hating on the Dutch? If this doesn't qualify I'll be slightly miffed. I mean, even if they are performing a disastorous 3rd in a hot second semi-final, surely that headdress should keep all audiences from a range of cultures really interested?

Will this win? No. Should it qualify? YES! C'mon Netherlands, this is your year to turn around that bad fortune!

Song rating: 7/10
Liklihood to win: 3/10

Current odds: 80-1                (oddschecker.com) (on average)